Friday, November 4, 2011

Boot Thoughts Day 5

Have you ever wondered who you would be if you weren't you?  How you pictured your life versus the reality of what it is.  I don't really ever do this during the summer, but I seem to come back to some of the same thoughts as soon as the snow flies. Or maybe I start getting burnt out and feel like,  "Something's got to give." Perhaps it has something to do with being a single woman with limited factors preventing me from changing everything.   I've always been split between wanting to live in a little brick house in the city with hard wood floors, white tile in the bathroom,  artwork on the walls, a fireplace, and drink a lot of red wine, and have a job that involves some travel. Life # 2 has me in a cabin in the mountains so rustic it barely has running water and spend my nights sitting in a rocking chair knitting socks and hats and skiing in and out of this darling little cabin.  In each day dream I my house is tidy and simple. 

In reality my place isn't anything of either sort, really.  OR maybe it's some of both.  It's definitely not one of those pristine sparkling city places with brick walls and everything old, but clean OR a darling mountain cabin.  I love my house but I have wondered several times, how did I get here?   Lately I've been feeling the need to purge my house of items I don't use much.  LIVE SIMPLY.  I hate the pack rat mentality that I sometimes have.  I have several friends that keep few things around their place and I want to be one of those people.  As I've been going through my house thinking of ditching a bunch of things, I think WHY did I ever think I needed this? 

I tend to romanticize so many different types of lifestyles.  People and places fascinate me.  The point of this blog is probably just to point out that I'm still not sure what direction I'm headed in, or who exactly I want to be.  Every year that passes that I get older I continue to question these things.  Not to be cliche' but I still haven't found what I'm looking for. I'm not even sure that that I really want to...

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